1. Before you set out into the world to make promises, contracts and agreements with other people, you must honor the ones you have made to yourself when you arrived on this planet. That requires in depth investigation and openness to the manifestations in the physical world of your mental and genetic patterns. ***Yeah, exactly...how and why do you always end up in this situation? Ask the question and then...crazy part...ANSWER IT. Honor the truth. For a true life is the only one that can ever make you truly happy. 2. Communicate what you learn about yourself to yourself so you can learn how to communicate it to someone else...and then do so courageously. Clarify it with each lesson, try out your theories, if they are wrong...change them immediately...how many times do you need to feel wrong before you feel right? ***Yeah, that means trusting your heart and when it is hurting honor your own pain...weather it is based on false expectations, delusional projections, or unspoken words. Because...hell...if they only knew how much this meant to you, how much it would hurt you, or how unchangeable this aspect of you were...then they could act accordingly. 3. Let go of that which does not serve your highest most amazing path to happiness. That means that when you don't get the response you expect to 1 and 2 don't try to play it off, change your mind to get a different result, or ignore the response. Honor the Truth of the other person and your own. ***Yup...every time you pretend you didn't mean exactly what you clearly stated from your heart, your heart will be wounded and your soul will know you are living a lie. Does this catch up to you? You bet! Do you get less attached over time? Nope...always MORE! So, choose...more pain or less. Either way the inevitable irreconcilable differences will arise. Honor your disagreements and know what is not negotiable. 4. Bless the life of the person who is leaving yours. Express gratitude for the qualities that made them lovable and for the time they gave you (Because its valuable...you can never get time back.) Be clear about why it is not going to work. Apologize for the hurt, support their pain, allow them time to understand and ask/answer any questions. In time, acknowledge the lessons learned and forgive them for perfectly being exactly who they are but not the one you are looking for. Speak good of them to others, and celebrate the joys of their life...that's the blessing for you and for them... ***Exactly...treat this person as a humane being and know that your hearts are forever entwined...your stories...your memories...and what adds to them...adds to you...what diminishes them...will hurt you. Heal together because now...tantrically speaking, and yes...tantra is magic...you are one being. 5. Awake and conscious beings enter into relationship with eyes and hearts open through fully releasing (forgiving) the past and surrendering to the current person, time and circumstance. In this way, we are able to mirror to each other the joy of love and truth without projection. Keep clear and continue to communicate what you know about yourself to be true through experience (The less taboo topics...the more clear the connection) about: sexuality, commitment, family, friends, children, marriage, money, home, travel, personal time and space, time together, hobbies, interests, spiritual practice, willingness to experiment and try new things, desire for routine, spontaneity, planning, health, what actions/words/touch they can best honor you with...and YOUR HEARTFELT DREAMS. ***Take these communications seriously because you are making soul agreements and considering making binding contracts. Soul agreements lead up to contracts and contracts can not be broken without karmic retribution. Any inability on one partner's part to honor agreements nullifies contracts and through a mutual agreement...cotnracts can be altered...i.e. forever bound...footnote...as friends family...etc... 6. Everyone has something they are holding back for the one being who will enter their life and honor a contract with them. Know what actions or activity leads to lifelong commitment...for example...children...marriage...ceremony...and take those things seriously. If you didn't understand this before...its okay...see #4 Write a letter, make a phone call, or see each other in person and then begin again at #5. ***The key here is a focus on maintaining or now beginning to have, RIGHT RELATIONS. Right relations are based on heartfelt communication. In the end...let the love remain and feed the grid of all human consciousness. There is a better way to end and begin...let us honor the hearts of all our brothers and sisters and give them the gift of new beginnings...to heal the hurts of many lifetimes in this moment when we are present and open to letting go of the past. 7. Surrender. We hold power over each other until we don't hold it anymore. Women hold the power of guilt and self-depreciation over a man. Surrender power and control over good men by forgiving them for reflecting your shadow and take responsiblity for your own projections. WE ALL GET EXACTLY WHAT WE EXPECT. EXPECT THE BEST AND HOLD SPACE FOR GOOD INTENTIONS BY ASKING CLARIFYING QUESTIONS...COMPASSIONATE INQUIRY. Ask hard questions and accept the answers. Clarify vague statements. Men hold the power of lack of expression and timidity over a woman. Surrender power and control over open women by truthfully expressing your ability to honor agreements and hold your words sacred by being honest. YOU GET EXACTLY WHAT YOU ASK FOR SO SAY WHAT YOU WANT, BE SPECIFIC, ALIGN YOUR WORDS, THOUGHTS AND ACTIONS and don't be surprised when they believe you. Honor them by deserving it. Speak clearly and inquire as to your real feelings on matters. 8. Human beings are sense oriented beings. We speak different languages but we absorb information in non-verbal ways. Touch, look, listen, feel, taste, smell...be present with your partner and then be present with yourself by meditating and doing what you love...taking in your self by spending whatever time you need to hear your own self responding...and spend time with each other enough to understand the essence of a being that can not be altered no matter the actions or words. ***Love is the seed...patience and unfolding is the flower. Be conscious in love...be conscious in life...compassionately transform all the shadows into joyful light. Many blessings on our joint journey to wholeness my brothers and sisters...thank you for adding your prayers to the ceremony and your lessons learned to these words. In so learning...may we all continue to grow and fulfill the blueprint to our soul's happiness and the healing of every sentient being, our Mother Earth...our Father Universe... Namaste.
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